It may be hard to imagine what a joy it is for a mother who once relinquished her child to adoption to finally hear their voice decades later. One such story that reached me today and was conveyed like this –
“I got the call I’ve waited on for almost 31 years. More so the past 2 years.
My Son called me! 💙💗
His voice was like that of someone I’ve always known. He sounded so familiar. Almost a 2 hour phone call. It was more than I ever imagined.💓
It may have taken a pandemic but it finally happened 🥰
And now I embark on this next rail of this roller coaster that has been my life. At least today I woke with a smile.”
Not every attempt at a reunion ends happy. Some mothers are so devastated that they have tried to block out all memories of the unhappy experience. They do not wish to remember what happened.
And in this time of isolating ourselves an in-person meeting may not be possible but I guarantee that someday this will all be in the past and while life may never look like it did before ever again, a new kind of normal will emerge.
An experience like the one I have shared is healing for both the mother and the adoptee when it goes so beautifully even with the complications of our current moment. Advice for entering into such a fragile beginning –
Understand your emotions will be very intense, this is normal.
Journal journal journal.
Cry cry cry.
Yet, try with all your might not to burden your child.
Ask for their permission before you do stuff.
Adoptees had no choice regarding what happened to them. If your relinquished child comes back, be grateful for such a blessing. Always be gentle towards both you and your child.
Missing Mom 