Tag: Attachment Disorders

Recommended – Robyn Gobbel

She was recommended today to someone who needed help with a 6 year old who goes into a really dark depression for about two weeks after contact with their genetic parents. An adopted person notes – you can’t stop the feeling after visits (this adult adoptee admits – I STILL feel it after every visit), however you can be taught how to best help her. And then, recommended – someone like LINK>Robyn Gobbel.

Robyn Gobbel has experience as a therapist for almost 20 years, specializing in complex trauma, attachment, and adoption. So, what is it like ? – to find someone – maybe a therapist, maybe someone else – who is willing to get lost with you. And to wait for you. Wait. With certainty.

Robyn is a mental health expert and parenting coach. She reveals how all behavior, no matter how baffling, can be explained and remedied. You just need to look past the behavior and understand what’s going on inside. Robyn decodes the latest brain science into easy-to-understand principles and metaphors which will help you to become an expert in your child’s behavior. She reveals simple ways to help you regulate and connect with your child, with brain, body and sensory-based strategies to overcome day-to-day challenges.

Robyn also provides you with the knowledge to understand and regulate your own brain – so that you don’t flip your lid when your child flips theirs.

Let this be your lifeline for parenting or caring for any child with baffling behaviors and hidden challenges, including kids who have experienced adversity, or with additional needs.

I Wish I Hadn’t

I wish, I wish, I wish…I wish I hadn’t adopted.

~ Donald Craig Peterson

Like a majority of families who’ve adopted children, I wasn’t mentally prepared for the surprises. You know, the chaos inside Fetal Alcohol Syndrome. The manipulation and triangulation inherent to attachment disorders. The invisible insanity associated with developmental trauma.

When the bad seemed destined to overshadow the good, I quietly questioned my decision – as well as my worth. It wasn’t exactly the wonderful life that I expected. What would have happened to your children if you hadn’t opened your home and your heart? If you hadn’t adopted? I’ve given that “what if” question serious thought more than once. The possibilities are dark – when envisioned through real stories of children that were never given a chance.

He goes on to detail what each of the 6 children he adopted would have experienced, at least as he imagines the not unbelievable outcomes for each because it is the fate and outcome for some children in the system. Clearly, he still believes in adoption. He admits – They were never perfect children and I was never the perfect parent. But together we meticulously and mindfully built a forever family in every sense of the word.

He writes – “My three youngest sons (22, 23 and 24) still feel safe after 20 years in my care and appreciate living under my roof. They desire independence yet aren’t ready to take on for the world. Someday perhaps.” And I am happy to read that his perspective on parenting is much like my husband’s and my own – we don’t care if our sons never leave their childhood home nor would we trap them here. We’ve said as much directly to them.

Donald Craig Peterson has stories to share about his successes as well as learning experiences in raising his six children to adulthood. It has been his goal to convey unconditional love throughout the years. He understands the ups and downs of learning challenges, special education, psychotropic medications, ADHD, Fetal Alcohol Syndrome, Bipolar Disorder, Reactive Attachment Disorder, sexual abuse, juvenile justice, residential placement and more. His blog is here: https://adoptingfaithafathersunconditionallove.org/.