Adult Adoptees Who Did Good

Spreading a bit of inspiration today to lead optimistic lives – I take a look at a few adoptees (many with kinship or step-parent type adoptions) who made some difference or achieved something worthwhile with their lives.

[1] Babe Ruth – was sent to an orphanage at a young age along with his sister. There he was taught and encouraged to play baseball. Ruth eventually spent 22 record-breaking seasons playing baseball and became one of America’s greatest baseball players.

[2] Eleanor Roosevelt – by the age of 15, Roosevelt was a double orphan. She was then adopted by her grandmother. Roosevelt would become the longest-serving First Lady of the United States, as well as a United States Delegate to the United Nations General Assembly. She has been called the “First Lady of the World” in tribute to her human rights achievements.

[3] Steve Jobs – Surrendered and adopted shortly after birth, Jobs was a successful entrepreneur who became the co-founder, chairman, and CEO of Apple Inc. He has personally been linked to the technological revolution that has swept the world.

[4] Melissa Gilbert – After being adopted as a baby, Gilbert went on to star as Laura Ingalls Wilder on the NBC series, Little House on the Prairie, from 1974 to 1984.

[5] John Hancock – Raised by extended family after the death of his father, Hancock became a prominent Patriot of the American Revolution. His signature is so well-recognized from signing the Declaration of Independence that the term “John Hancock” has become a synonym for signature, which point was made in the Will Smith movie Hancock.

[6] Michael Oher – Adopted at age 17 after spending years in various foster homes, Oher went on to play offensive lineman for the Ole Miss Rebels and then was drafted by the Baltimore Ravens in the first round of the 2009 NFL Draft. He is the main character in the movie, The Blind Side, which won an Academy Award movie.

[7] Nelson Mandela – Raised by a tribe chief after his father’s death (when Mandela was 9 years old), he was President of South Africa from 1994 to 1999. He was the first to be elected in a fully representative democratic election. He was known as a revolutionary, politician, and philanthropist.

[8] Leo Tolstoy – Raised by extended family after the death of his parents, Tolstoy became a famous Russian novelist, short story writer, essayist, playwright, and philosopher. His written work is still widely read today.

[9] Nancy Reagan – After her parents separated, Reagan (born Anne Frances Robbins) lived with an aunt and uncle during most of her childhood. She eventually reunited with her mom and took her stepfather’s last name, “Davis.” She was the First Lady during her husband’s administration.

[10] Dave Thomas – Born in Atlantic City, New Jersey, to a young unmarried woman he never knew, Thomas was adopted at 6 weeks old. At age 5, when his (adoptive) mother died, Thomas moved in with his grandmother. As an adult, Thomas became the founder and CEO of Wendy’s restaurant chain.

[11] Edgar Allan Poe – Born in 1809, Poe’s father abandoned the family in 1810. His mother died the following year. Orphaned, he went to live with the Allan family in Virginia, who then raised him to adulthood. He was an American writer known for his poetry and short stories, particularly his mysteries. He is considered the inventor of detective fiction.

[12] Gerald Ford – Leslie Lynch King Jr was only 16 days old when his parents went their separate ways. A couple of years later, King’s mother remarried and they changed Leslie Lynch King Jr’s name to Gerald Rudolph Ford Jr, in honor of his stepfather (whom Ford says played a wonderful role in his life). Ford was our 38th President of the United States.

[13] Simone Biles – After spending time in and out of foster care, Biles was adopted by her grandparents who helped her pursue her dream to reach the Olympics. As an American gymnast, Biles became the 2016 Olympic individual all-around, vault, and floor gold medalist. As an integral part of the “Final Five,” she is currently the most decorated American gymnast with nineteen Olympic and World Championship medals.

Getting Kids Out Of Foster Care

This is actually a re-run of a campaign that the Dave Thomas Foundation for Adoption and Wendy’s fast food restaurants have run before. The current campaign was launched in November 2020 in conjunction with National Adoption Month. Wendy’s also partnered with Coca-Cola and Dr Pepper on a drink promotion using Wendy’s mobile app that allows consumers to get something and give something back with no extra effort.

To their credit, Wendy’s does seem to want the focus to be on foster care. From Wendy’s own public relations release –

Wendy’s is passionate about raising funds and awareness of the urgent need for adoptive families for youth in foster care. There’s no better time to support the Dave Thomas Foundation for Adoption’s mission to dramatically increase the number of adoptions of children waiting in North America’s foster care systems. Through its signature program, Wendy’s Wonderful Kids, the Dave Thomas Foundation for Adoption serves youth who are most at risk of aging out of foster care without a family, including teenagers, children with special needs and siblings. In partnership with child welfare advocates, policymakers and adoption professionals, the Dave Thomas Foundation for Adoption has helped find permanent, loving homes for nearly 10,000 children in foster care and counting.

Through Wendy’s Wonderful Kids, the Dave Thomas Foundation for Adoption provides grants to adoption agencies to hire and train adoption recruiters who implement the Foundation’s evidence-based Child-Focused Recruitment Model. This model is said to be up to 3 times more effective at serving children who have been in foster care the longest, including older youth, sibling groups and children with special needs.

Wendy’s Wonderful Kids recruiters work with smaller caseloads of children, ensuring they have the time and resources to give each child as much attention as he or she deserves. By the time these children are referred to a recruiter:

[1] 90% are older than age 8

[2] 33% have had six or more placements

[3] 52% have been in foster care more than four years

Dedicated to finding the right home for every child, adoption recruiters begin their search within a child’s familiar circles of family, friends and neighbors and then reach out to the communities in which they live.

I do like their focus on the child’s own family or original environment. I can’t argue that their hearts are not in the right place.

As to the key tag, your ability to purchase one ended on January 31, 2021. For those who bought one, the key tag is redeemable for one free Jr Frosty treat per visit with purchase throughout 2021. If one really loves Wendy’s Frosty, the $2 invested is a bargain and some portion goes back to support the work of the Dave Thomas Foundation for Adoption.

It’s NOT A Rescue Mission

Wendy’s Dave Thomas

I don’t eat fast food and so I wasn’t aware of the huge push for adoption that Wendy’s is a part of. It turns out that the founder, Dave Thomas, was himself an adoptee. To the extent that his foundation seeks to move children out of foster care, I suppose that is somewhat commendable.

Images of waiting children the foundation uses in it’s promotions play into the “rescue the child” attitude so prevalent in adoption marketing. There is a strong emotional pull to pick up this lonely child. Many prospective adoptive parents begin from a “missionary” mindset which is why an adoptive mindset is also prevalent among Christians. They expect the child to be forever grateful and well-behaved – after all the adoptive parents have “saved” a child from squalor.

No adoptee wants to be pitied or made to feel that they are getting a handout or are some kind of charity case. It’s demoralizing.

Adoptive parents often find that the child has complex issues they didn’t expect. They are surprised that the child is often angry or resentful. There are other complicated emotions as well – rejection, abandonment, confusion, fear, isolation . . . the list goes on.

The best advice for anyone who seeks to get involved in such a situation is always respect the child as a full person. Don’t take away their name or identity. Don’t falsify their birth certificate. If there is any opportunity for them to be reunified with their original family, do your best to support and encourage that.