Tag: Tragedies

Adoption Is Not God’s Plan

Personally, I do believe in accepting “what is” in life. In my all things adoption group today I read –

I see this frequently on adoptive parent’s Facebook pages – Adoption was God’s plan for them. It is what He wanted and placed on their hearts. Their “baby” was meant just for them despite growing in another’s womb. So IF God gets all this credit, if a major loss for baby and family was your answered prayer, blah, blah, blah. Their loss was your blessing, etc.

So you know, God caused all this pain and destruction because it was “meant to be.” Then wtf is infertility? How can your “blessing” and another’s loss both be “meant to be?” Your adopted baby was meant for you. Created in the womb for you by God, and all that baloney. Does this mindset only not apply to infertility because it doesn’t benefit you. Could it not be said that maybe, just maybe it wasn’t “meant to be” for you to be a parent at all?

Thank goodness we have a billion dollar a year industry that preys on poor families. Thank goodness we have a government with ridiculous income limits for financial resources. Too bad God can’t get the ratio right – to benefit all the infertile people who want to be parents. There are at least 50 hopeful adoptive parents to every newborn given up for adoption.

One admittedly non religious person commented – I often wonder about our modern day problems (society within the last 200 years of western civilization), and how many of them would be solved by living in close knit communities with strong values in collectivism, as our ancestors did. If infertile women had strong, daily roles as alloparents to children in their community, sometimes providing more individual care than a natural parent. Would they feel so inclined to adopt? I feel like the need and desire for adoption would be drastically diminished, if people lived that way…

blogger’s note – I do believe in an over-arching, life force Presence – some call that God, others Spirit. There are many names for what people sense spiritually. I simply would NOT exist, if my parents (both of them) had not been adopted. It is “what is”. I believe I did not end up adopted myself (my mom was a high school junior and my dad a first year university student), so that I could reconnect the threads of my family’s genetic identity that had been broken by adoption (my destiny or purpose here). Something my parents were not able (my mom) or did not want (my dad) to do. While I believe there is something that responds to me, I also believe we are not controlled by God. We are left alone to discover what this thing called Life is all about, while we are yet here physically.

Life Can Be Difficult

Keanu Reeves

Keanu Reeves and his sister Kim were born to Patricia Taylor, a costume designer and showgirl, and Samuel Reeves, a geologist in Beirut, Lebanon. The actor was only three years old when his father abandoned his family, leaving Patricia Taylor alone to raise the two children all by herself. Throughout his younger years, Keanu Reeves and his sister would move around with their mother quite a bit and have lived in Hawaii, Australia, and even New York. Finally, Patricia Taylor settled down in Canada with her children.

Although Samuel Reeves was barely around in his childhood, his actions were still able to fill Keanu Reeves with pain. The last time he spoke to his father was around the age of 13. Years after being abandoned by his father, when the actor became a world-famous star, his father was arrested for the possession of cocaine and heroin in the 1990s. Samuel Reeves was given a sentence of 10 years behind bars.

“The story with me and my dad’s pretty heavy. It’s full of pain and woe and f***ing loss and all that s**t,” Reeves said.

Samuel Reeves has opened up about his estranged relationship with Keanu Reeves and blamed himself for the broken, practically non-existent relationship they share. The last memory that he has of his now-famous son is one where Keanu Reeves is still a little boy and they’re in Hawaii’s Big Island, splashing around in the water.

The father admits that his addiction to drugs and his shifty lifestyle stopped him from having a proper relationship with Kim and Keanu Reeves. From afar, Samuel Reeves has seen his son go through tragic moments, which include the actor losing his daughter after she was stillborn and losing the mother of his child, Jennifer Syme, whom he once loved.